THE QUINT-QUARTS VS. MADEMOISELLE MENSA (CONCLUSION), by Rodin.Two remaining muta-cloned super-heroines battle a duo of megalomaniacal villains inside the very heart and soul of the U.S. government. An ultimate fate for more than a dozen stupefied victims of MM’s raygun (including Empath Girl and Ingeno-Lady), as well as the integrity and fairness of free-world politics, hangs in the balance. Identities for Mensa’s accomplice and two of the Genesis Donors are revealed in this episode.
author's footnotes: 1)This fictional tale depicts detailed and(at times)explicit circumstances involving
physical attraction to/physical relations with paralyzed or "statued" women.
All readers are hereby cautioned as to content, and any individual under the age
of twenty-one is prohibited from reading further. Similarly, any person who
disagrees with the philosophy and/or intent of an ASFR story page should now
exercise their freedom guaranteed under the US constitution and NOT continue.
2)The anonymous author of the "Quint-Quarts" series retains all ownership rights
to concepts and characters created by him. Although comments are welcomed,,
no edit, adaptation or extension of the storyline or characters should be under-
taken without the author's written permission. Please contact this story page
administrator to correspond. Your consideration in this matter is appreciated..
As needed, the standard legalese ..."any similarities to persons living or dead
(or previously penned) is purely coincidental"...applies.
3) Kudos once again go to CMQ and Lost Cause Productions for inspirations with the
comic-book-type story line. Although I didn’t read many comics as a youngster, I
see that I've missed out on many ASFR scenes and ideas. An interesting degree of
writing freedom is offered by this part-reality, part-fantasy world. If these super-
heroine adventures attract a following, the QQ’s may return to take another bow…
Copyright © 1998 B.B.
THE QUINT-QUARTS VERSUS MADEMOISELLE MENSA
(CONCLUSION to parts one and two written on comic pages 1-28) by Rodin
Previously, both Empath Girl and Ingeno-Lady have fallen victim to the dumbfounding effects of Mademoiselle’s insidious brain-drain raygun. With time running out before MM and Thomas complete construction and delivery of the multi-target mind-controller, various clues point the remaining heroines of the Quintessential Quartet (also Nils, Scott, and the mysterious Genesis Donors) toward our nation’s capital. Special TV news reports airing yesterday evening quoted eyewitnesses who saw the Ionospheric Clipper briefly touch down on the Washington, D.C. Mall. A single passenger vanished into the crowd.
COMIC PAGE TWENTY-NINE(two days following page 28): It is late morning in the opulent Congressional suite of House Speaker Thomas Everett "Salamander" Gangreen. Inside his spacious personal office, the late February sun streams through tall bay windows onto nearly-priceless Louis XIV furniture. These and other decorations sit atop several beautifully-ornate and elaborately-woven Persian carpets. A healthy blaze in the oversized stone fireplace is stoked by the room's single occupant. An almost-decrepit, diminutive white-haired lady in a green silk blouse and hunter flannel skirt first checks the Speaker's appointment calendar for the day, then returns to her tasks at the room's filing cabinets. This seemingly-mid-70's woman barely notices a moment later when Gangreen himself bursts back into his office. He engages a companion in animated-but-hushed conversation. Dressed once again in her faux-major's uniform, we now recognize Mademoiselle Mensa. The evil villainess spies the little old lady and ceases talking, while nudging her partner-in-crime. He responds verbally with, "What...Huh?...Oh that's just Victoria, my top executive assistant. She's been with me ever since my days back in Smyrna. Loyal beyond question. We can speak freely here- you needn't pay her any attention at all. Vickie? Would you be a sweetheart and go fetch us some coffee, dear? Thanks." Laying down her notepad and a new electronic organizer, the aged assistant leaves the room shuffling at a snail's pace.
"Everything ees completed, and ees proceeding according to our Plan A timetable, Cheri! The new-and-improved brain-train ees scheduled for delivery early this afternoon.
All we need now ees a relatively secure spot within 250 feet of the House floor, where the mechanism can operate undisturbed". Her accomplice considers the oversized hatbox
sitting on his mahogany desk once belonging to Napoleon, then responds, "That's really great news baby. Everything's perfect. My custom-tailored transmitter headpiece came back from the haberdasher this morning. Barring any more meddling from that FBI agent, or (what's left of) those annoying goodie Quint-Quarts, today our government will be back on the RIGHT track for the first time in fifty years. And of course, gorgeous, all 30 of those lucrative new defense contracts in our budget will just happen to be awarded to your Artificial Intellicorp company. Shall I collect my thanks from you here and now?", he says, while gazing lustfully into her bright green eyes. Victoria's reappearance bearing a silver tray with Limoges coffee pot and cups lowers the room temperature back down.
(Unbeknownst to either criminal, Victoria's hearing aid has been receiving amplified audio signals from a combo transmitter-recording device concealed in her pocket organizer).
"As you know, Thomas, we have discussed this little matter before", continues MM. "Once Mrs. Gangreen ees permanently out of the picture, I will give myself to you body and soul. And you know I am zerious, cheri. I cut all ties with my dearest friend and partner Tom Brookes to demonstrate my faithfulness to you. Remember that he was our very first brain-drain test subject? Without Tom, we wouldn't have discovered the initial problemz using my weapon on men. It's just his bad luck he ended up permanently insane. Besides, nothing would please me more than to become 'Mrs. Speaker', except perhapz 'Mrs. First Lady'. Of course, chou chou, that's where our Plan B enters into the picture".
French-kissing Gangreen as a passionate tease, she parts with, "We rendevous at 1:45!"
The House Speaker ducks into his private bathroom-dressing area to wash up and prepare for lunch. Immediately, the white-haired woman proceeds to the organizer and presses three key buttons in a particular sequence. At first only a distant crackling is heard, then Scott McGillicutty's muffled voice spills out of a tiny speaker in back of the device:
"This is Mother's Nest...we're receiving you loud and clear, Turtledove...go ahead please".
An angry Victoria replies, "DAMMIT Scott, cut out the cloak-and-dagger stuff and get the Professor on the line. Doctor One was absolutely right! House Speaker 'Salamander' Gangreen is Mensa's accomplice. And their 'Plan A'- whatever that is- begins here in Washington in less than two hours! I'm going to need backup, do you READ ME?? Scott, are you..."? She is forced to break off as Gangreen returns back into the office. Matter-of-factly, he addresses his executive assistant, saying, "Vickie, as you know, I'll be brainstorming with Senator Entrench Alot over lunch. He's being a self-righteous pain-in-the-ass again, so I'll need some leverage with him. Would you please get the "dirty-tricks" dossier on his affair with that bimbo out of the safe for me, dear?" Victoria freezes in her tracks in near-panic, looking about the room. It takes a moment before Thomas notices her hesitation. "Vickie? What's wrong? I told you to open the safe and get me that file ...NOW!" Again she does not (cannot) comply, and then the realization dawns on him.
He reaches into his desk and draws out a .38 caliber pistol. "Yes, I see now...I don't have the pleasure of addressing Vickie, do I?" Suddenly, the woman's appearance becomes imprecise, cloudy- almost molten. Face and figure contort and twist, while hairs regain a strawberry-blonde color and beautiful texture. Decades drop off her frame, and posture straightens and improves, along with a dramatic change(for the better) in her legs, derriere and bustline. Looker stands before the Speaker, now reverted back from her proto-matter assisted impersonation. Thomas pauses momentarily to view the dazzling woman in front of him before summoning security. Of course, Vickie's borrowed clothing ill-fits the super-heroine's incredible curves. In particular, Looker's 40D breasts are veritably exploding out of confinement. The QQ can't help but notice the villain's lewd appraisal of her boobs, and this gives her an idea. Concentrating once again to enact her appearance-altering abilities, she morphs this time more subtly, but with greater influence. Looker's already-striking countenance acquires an ethereal quality, emitting an angelic glow and shine. Her now-irresistible hazel eyes sparkle. She flashes a drop-dead-gorgeous smile at the politician,and notes with satisfaction that his jaw drops open slightly. He is clearly flabbergasted by her muta-clone-enhanced beauty. "Like what you see, Mr. Speaker?", she coos seductively. As his reeling mind fights a losing battle against his crotch, all he can do is blankly nod in the affirmative. For a final blow, the super-heroine slowly unbuttons her blouse, then pulls away the undersized bra. Looker's magnificent tits both expand and cascade at once, and this overwhelmingly sexy sight finishes him off. He mumbles, "Oh My G..." and then can only gape dumbly at her big alluring melons. The gun falls out of his hand onto the floor. Gangreen's eyes track the slightly-bobbing breasts as the pleased-with-herself Quint-Quart strolls over to the desk to dial the telephone. "Don't you think FBI agent Straightarrow will be fascinated to hear all about your Plan A, darling?" Again, all he can muster against Looker's weapon of extreme beauty is a slight nod of assent. She casually cocks her hips sideways, with one supporting hand leaning on the desktop while the line connects."Hello, John? Looker here. I think I've got this Mensa case just about under...unnnddd... uunnn... unk...unnnkk....uuunnnnkkk......." A blue light and 'sucking' sound come from behind her.
Mademoiselle Mensa removes the receiver from the stupefied super-heroine's rigid grasp, and hangs up as the FBI agent screams HELLO?? LOOKER?? HELLO?! Next
she revives the Speaker of the House by jealously slapping him hard across the face. "Our coquettement of a bit earlier left me flustered, monsieur. I mistakenly left my briefcase behind. Good thing I came back for it, n'est-ce pas?. Now what shall we do with her?" Slowly escaping from Looker's sexy spell, Thomas blurts out, "Nothing. Escort the train into the building, and I'll catch up with you as planned." MM notices the look in his eye, as well as the growing bulge in his trousers. She hesitates to leave her political puppet and financial meal-ticket alone with a woman of equal (or greater) sex appeal who's just been frozen in mid-sentence. However, their tight timetable doesn't allow her any time to argue.
As the exiting Mademoiselle turns to close the office door, she catches the House Speaker in the act of repositioning Looker. She shuts the door down to only a crack, and secretly watches events unfold. Pivoting the upright QQ to face across his desk, he then bends her upper body down and forward until two incredible boobs sway pendulum-like beneath her. Thimble-sized rose pink nipples hover six inches above the blotter. Next he bends up both forearms, and cups open palms beneath her chin. The weight of her Greek goddess' torso thus becomes supported by two elbows on the desk. From a distance, she might be mistaken for a careful reader of the many legal documents directly beneath her gaze; except she is quite severely cross-eyed. Cupped hands close a slacked jaw (for now).
With her top-half fully posed, Thomas concentrates on luscious treasures below the waist. Vertically pulling and rolling up the flannel skirt, he succeeds in transforming it essentially into a waist sash. He straightens Looker's long undulating legs some six inches apart, leaving on her tan stay-up stockings and two-inch green heels. One clothing article out-of-character with the role of Victoria is the QQ's neon lime thong. Gangreen quickly cuts the spagetti-like underwear off to fully expose the woman's remarkable white bottom.
Between immobile bent-round cheeks, strawberry blonde curls veil a moist pink heaven.
An angry MM closes the office door as the Speaker's pants hit the floor. While leaving the outer suite, she hears a helpless super-heroine eject longer and louder cries of "OOookk".
COMIC PAGE THIRTY: "...And, I say again that we MUST stand united against the forces of unfairness and special privilege! America was founded on the principles of equal opportunity and justice for all. We can't permit the gulf between the 'have's' and 'have nots' to widen further in an era of self-centeredness and greed. Every John Doe on Main Street must be the equal of the richest man on Wall Street, and the most powerful man or woman in Washington. I urge you to go to your phones NOW and speak to your Congressman. Send a message that we will NOT stand for this evisceration of the lower and middle classes! We are ONE people striving for greatness together, and no man or group can be allowed to have elitist, 'above the law', better-than-the-rest-of-us status..."
While President Bob Clampett finishes his Rose Garden pep talk to the nation prior to the House veto override vote, he's flanked for moral support by a loyal Vice-President Alan Gere on his left, and his sexy redheaded personal secretary Suzy Slutsky on the right. Clampett's Press Secretary Tom Stepalloverus stands next to her. Quite distractingly, during the final moments of his speech, the Commander-in-Chief notes his pants zipper being lowered behind the podium, and long-nailed fingers generously massaging 'The First Dick'. Bob hadn't planned on many questions afterwards; but he is in no condition to leave right now. Although he has Miss United States and her entourage wrinkling-up in hot tubs across town, Suzy's talented attentions convince him to first give "dicktation" back in the Oval Office. In his excitement, Clampett doesn't see Stepalloverus' hand underneath Suzy's miniskirt, squeezing her bare butt. Secret Service agents surrounding them want to vomit.
COMIC PAGE THIRTY-ONE: Just ten steps away from the U.S. House chamber is a small 6'x12' cubicle with a frosted glass office door. In past decades, the location served as a notorious 'cloak room', where dubious under-the-table compromise deals were struck. For the past several years, however, the site has become a small copier room, where minor changes and amendments to legislative bills hammered out on the floor of the House are quickly incorporated and distributed to the Representatives for written consideration. Two Xerox machines usually stand in tandem at the front and back of this narrow room, with their controls facing into an open middle space. However, earlier today (under somewhat mysterious circumstances) one of the room's copiers had 'gone down'- apparently from an entire cup of coffee poured inside its photoelectric innards. The rear floor space usually occupied by this ill-fated machine stands temporarily vacant.We now witness the arrival of a replacement 'photocopier', as well as four people accompanying its Congressional debut.
Removing an "Out of Order" sign from the glass office door as he enters, the service technician from Always Speedy & Friendly Repair Copier Co.wears pale purple coveralls and a large pink baseball cap atop pulled-up platinum blonde hair. He deftly maneuvers the new machine into a back-left-corner position, placing its left edge against the wall. Plugging the new copier into an electrical outlet, we watch him make many delicate final technical adjustments to the new machine as it whirrs to life. Surprisingly, House Speaker 'Salamander' Gangreen himself escorts the copier into the old cloak room while carrying an oversized black hat box in his hands. He places the box down on the rear copier and then turns around to lasciviously appraise his two intriguing college-age companions.
Roberta and Barbara VanderHaven have only arrived ten days before to begin their
term sabbatical from USC as Congressional Pages. Their mediocre academic qualifications notwithstanding (both are C+ average junior political science majors); dear old daddy's $500,000 GOPAC contribution seems to have carried some small weight in Bobbie and Barbie's selection from a pool more than 10,000 applicants. In fact, Gangreen has seen to it that these knockout Southern California beach bunnies be assigned to his own personal page staff. With mirror-image 5'8" lithe athletic builds, long luscious legs and waist-long flowing bleach-blonde hair, these darkly-tanned identical twins seem more than a bit out of place along corridors of US political power-perhaps having taken a sharp wrong turn from Laguna sands? Indeed, Mr. Speaker considers their impressive 37D-25-36 figures to be wasted inside matching severe gray pinstriped pant suits, instead of identical micro bikinis.
Scrutinizing the oval faces of these green-eyed beauties, a look of annoyance is apparent. Each carries a thick book under one arm: War and Peace and The Brothers Karamazov.
"Mr. Speaker, just how long do ya think it will take us to copy those chapters you said ya needed!?", begins one of the twin sisters. "Bobbie and I didn't mention it 'til now, but we've got back-stage passes to tonight's Smashing Pumpkins concert at RFK, so...", her voice trails off, courage ebbing under a withering glare from Gangreen. The sadistic villain glances at the service technician, who winks back at him from behind fake horn-rimmed eyeglasses, nodding 'OK'. The politician opens the hatbox and places a startling headpiece atop his thinning silver hair. The VanderHavens exchange dual looks of incredulity, which quickly transform one-by-one into dazed compliant stares after he removes a small remote control from his suit pocket and depresses the POWER then SINGLE buttons. "Girls, I'm afraid I must detain you. As credible distractions, you'll conceal our brain-train perfectly". Eyeing the curves beneath Barbie's thin silken blouse, he commands her to open Tolstoi.
COMIC PAGE THIRTY-TWO: "Descent angle 22 degrees…velocity 350 meters per second", drones the computerized navigator/co-pilot aboard the Ionospheric Clipper. Maw is focused intently upon the myriad of dials and LED indicators surrounding her in the Quint-Quarts’ supersonic Space-Shuttle-type transport. Not counting the dozen or so
hours of recent flight simulation back at base, this is only the second time she has piloted the IC. Although the airship’s non-aerodynamic landing trajectory (Inga had described the sleek craft as a ‘rock with wings’) at first intimidated her on her inaugural flight back from Looker's espionage mission drop-off yesterday; this striking QQ warrior is now getting the hang of flying. Maw rechecks the tiny D.C. landing coordinates on her targeting computer.
Three loyal companions accompany the only member of the Quintessential Quartet
still in possession of her mental faculties after facing Mademoiselle Mensa’s raygun. Scott
McGillicutty sits at the IC’s high-tech repair workbench, tinkering with a deflector module microcircuit inside one of Nils’and Inga’s ECM telepathic defense headsets. The timid- but-brilliant technical assistant keeps one eye on the pilot’s controls during their stomach- churning plummet towards the nation’s capital. Nearby to him sits Inga’s Genesis Donor, who is carefully scrutinizing schematics from Dr. Fujiotyama’s cold fusion reactor designs. Always regarded as one of the "book smartest" women in the world, Dr. Joyce Sisters has found inspiration in the past two years in her affiliations with Nils Johannson (and now her daughter-clone) to become expert in the fields of theoretical quantum mechanics, circuits- devices-systems and microprocessors. Lastly, tightly strapped in a passenger’s flight chair (and nervously clutching the arms of her seat) is Kathy England, the instantly-recognizable
world-famous supermodel, and Looker’s DNA donor. Having just reviewed the transcript of the audio playback recovered from her clone’s spy mission to Gangreen’s office, she now expresses both great anger (at Looker’s apparent dumfounded defeat) and confusion.
"I just don’t see the FUSS over this House appropriations veto override, anyway! It says in Cosmopolitan that the Republicans want a 65% reduction in the civilian budget, to be split into 45% new military spending and 20% tax cuts. Why doesn’t anybody who
loses their government job or support just enlist to grab one of the new jobs in the army?" All three of Kathy’s colleagues are far too involved with their tasks to be annoyed at this stupidity. "And", she continues, "20% tax savings would mean everybody can afford to go to the Bahamas at least once a year, right? I SAID, am I RIGHT??" They tune her out.
Tourists on the Mall watch in amazement as the IC swoops narrowly past the Washington Monument to splash down with a giant watery roar in the Lincoln Memorial reflecting pool. Seconds later, a top hatch swivels open, and four closely-bunched figures (one almost totally transparent) float upward and rocket away toward the Capitol building.
COMIC PAGE THIRTY-THREE: "Nice hat, Sallie. Are you expecting a coronation or something?", begins minority leader Rich Gelbardt as he watches Gangreen and a purple- and-pink copier repairman stroll up to the podium in the U.S. House of Representatives chamber. Getting our first look at the newly-refurbished brain-train control helmet, we note its rather pompous and presumptive appearance. Looking very much like a crown straight out of an Imperial margarine commercial from the 1970's, the functional silver-and gold scullcap is now concealed by snow leopard fur around its base and crumpled purple velvet above.Rising from between fur and cloth are four jewel-encrusted thick gold pillars, which curl to the middle and meet at a point some twelve inches above Thomas' forehead.
Mounted atop this peak is an intricately carved, full-sized jade salamander statue. More than just a mere symbol of power as with other monarchs, this crown (with help from the device in the cloak/copier room) is the source and center of Speaker Gangreen's influence.
As the duo moves alongside Gelbardt, Mademoiselle Mensa unzips her coveralls to step out of that disguise and reveal her other fake identity as USAF Major Havoc. From inside a briefcase she pulls her raygun, placing a blinking electronic tiara atop perfect blonde hair.
Not receiving an answer from the villain as to his query, the Democratic leader turns to begin the formal proceedings of the veto override vote. While conferring with his new young lady Minority Whip beside him, Gelbardt doesn't notice as Gangreen depresses the MULTI button setting on a hand-held remote control until it is too late. Immediately his own (and everyone else's within range)thoughts cloud and fragment, to be replaced first by a buzzing loud static noise inside his captured mind, and then by absolutely nothing at all.
As the megalomaniacal politician mentally commands You will all listen and OBEY me!!, hundreds of subjects (400+ representatives, House staff, media and visitors in the gallery) rapidly en masse snap to vacant full attention awaiting instructions from their new master.
Next, Thomas eliminates the non-essential personnel by commanding all victims except for chamber door security guards, the CSPAN cameramen upstairs and the actual Representatives themselves to fall into a deep and sound sleep. A remarkable sight ensues, whereby nearly five hundred men and women simultaneously collapse like marionettes whose strings have suddenly been cut. Carefully stepping over these crumpled forms, the remaining key players in this bizarre drama move to their seats, commencing an unanimous veto override vote which will give the Speaker of the House his stop-at-nothing victory.
Unfortunately, Gangreen's political arch-enemies will experience more than a forced vote. With the sargeant-at-arms droning the roll call poll in the background (Mr. Abrams...AYE
.....Ms. Achison...AYE.....Ms. Antonio...AYE.....Mr. Azinger...AYE, etc.), the evil villain grins and turns in triumph to face the dazed Minority Leader and Whip. Deciding to leave the best for last, Thomas chooses to teach several other key members appropriate lessons first. After a push of the brain-train's SINGLE button, Representative Joe Connolly from Massachusetts, heir to the famous powerful Connolly political dynasty, is seen extending his "tax and spend" liberal policies to his own family's considerable financial fortune. He now writes personal checks with six and seven zeros attached for dozens of his pet welfare projects (axed in the about-to-be-adopted Republican budget, of course). Sharon Gurley-Black, ultra-feminist representative from Vermont, is commanded to face the TV cameras and perform a slow-motion striptease; placing her small tits, pussy and somewhat-sagging backside on objectified display for her constituency. An equal-opportunity champion and constitutional law expert from New York state finds his outspoken support for gay rights put to the test(both orifices at once)in the chamber aisle, with the help of male Democratic members from the San Francisco Bay Area. Does Gangreen's sadism know any bounds?
Now reconsidering the political leaders beside him, Thomas’ attention naturally gravitates away from the middle-aged Gelbardt and focuses upon the newly-appointed Minority Whip. This world-famous Olympic gold medalist has recently been forced into early retirement from downhill ski racing by a knee injury at the age of 27. Peak-was-too Steep, however, was elected to the House from Montana in an avalanche, due to both her All-American Girl image; as well as backlash effects from recent tragic ski fatalities among political big-whigs Her campaign slogan: "Elect a Representative who CAN ski well!"
Peak-was-too's name recognition (along with support from retiring Whip Patricia Shraeder of Colorado, another Congressional skiing enthusiast) thrust the athlete into the spotlight as Rich Gelbart's right-hand-woman. But this political neophyte knew a lot more about running a slalom gradient than running the House, so she had thus far 'towed the party line' in mirror-image to the Minority Leader's lead. This rubber-stamping added fuel to a GOP fire, as critics(Gangreen prominent among them) hinted she was dumb and too intimidated to make her own decisions. Dressed in a cheerful and pretty pale yellow suit with a ruffled white blouse, the athlete's powerful legs undulate under sheer white stockings as she waits at attention. Steep's powder-blue two-inch heels stretch taut strong calf and thigh muscles, while also matching her multi-ribbon bow tie perfectly. Her blue eyes, freckles and sandy- blonde short haircut accentuate that wholesome, girl-next-door image which elected her. As both villains focus their cruel attentions on the two Democratic leaders, we note that sufficient time has passed for the 'glitch' in the train's microcircuitry to become manifest. Victims regain some power over their speech, and the following bizarre dialogue ensues:
"Rich, old friend, it seems things are well under control...you might say ABSOLUTE control! My budget appropriations WILL pass despite you and that Hillbilly's efforts to stop them", says Gangreen. Gelbardt struggles to respond, "Sallie, I don't know HOW you are accomplishing this, but I won't let you get away with this kangaroo vote". Confused and frightened, Peak-was-too exclaims, "What's happening to me? I can't move or...(her name is called in the vote) AYE!...Huh? Oh my God! Salamander Gangreen, you bastard!" Having cast affirmative votes, the pair from Missouri and Montana are fully at his mercy.
Thomas nods while listening intently to the sadistic suggestions MM whispers into his ear before continuing, "Neither of you appear to fully appreciate your circumstances. With the technical assistance of my lovely colleague here, I have reduced both of you to nothing more than powerless figureheads atop your party. And you, Rich, will now demonstrate
to Democrats everywhere via CSPAN how perfect you are as their mascot!" Gangreen's eyes narrow, and Gelbardt starts to loosen his tie. Fighting his inescapable fate, Gelbardt protests, "DAMN YOU Sallie! I swear that... AAWWW!...Huh??... that whatever it takes...EEEEAWWW!...I'll get you for thi..... HEE-HAWW!... EEEEE-HAWWW!..." Moments later, the House Leader drops nude on hands and knees, braying and lumbering away from the podium in his new(?) role as a jackass. The power-crazed Speaker of the House then turns to a wild-eyed Minority Whip and says, "YOU, my pretty young lady, have quite disappointed me. That famous Steep courage and daredeviltry you showed on the slopes simply vanished into thin air, once that mother hen Pat Shraeder elected you to Whip. You haven't got enough guts to take your own stand on ANY political issue! The time has come for the whole world to see you as you really are." In the initial hesitant few seconds(while the command imprints onto her subconscious)Peak-was-too begs for mercy with, "PLEASE Mr. Speaker...you CAN'T do this! I haven't...BAWAAK!... Oh my God, No!...BUK BUK BAWAAAK!...I'm not a ch...BAWK!...BAWWAAK". During these futile pleas, athletic hands moved against her will to remove, suit, blouse, bra, and panties. Clad only in heels, white stay-up hose and a powder blue necktie, Peak-was-too bends her knees deeply and crouches down, her hands clamped firmly onto strong round buttocks. With elbow-wings flapping and head bobbing forward, she now begins her humiliating strut around an imaginary barnyard as the pullet she believes herself to be. A helpless sad expression is in her dull eyes. MM and Thomas collapse onto the podium in cruel laughter.
Their jubilation is suddenly interrupted by a familiar-but-disembodied voice, "Mensa, I knew YOU were one twisted bitch; but the Speaker of the US House of Representatives as your sadistic partner-in-crime? All this to pass a budget? It’s too much to be believed!"
Caught off guard for a few seconds by this unexpected intrusion, MM recovers to aim her raygun at the owner of this strong feminine voice, yet sees no one there. In the next instant
a nearly-invisible shadowy translucence hurtles directly at the evil villainess, who squeezes the trigger of her weapon in a wild last-second shot. The thin green brain-pain ray misses its intended target and strikes a Republican representative from Arizona, who immediately
clutches his head with his hands and passes out onto the floor. Then our fair super-heroine re-materializes right in front of the misanthropic Mademoiselle, landing a savage martial-arts blow which sends MM reeling backwards against the podium wall, where she slumps unconscious down onto the floor. Smiling confidently while sensing victory, Maw turns with hands on hips to face Salamander Gangreen. The Speaker frantically tries to implant
various incapacitating and controlling commands into the Quint-Quart’s brain, but without any success. As confusion and frustration over his inability to influence her thoughts show visibly on his face, Maw touches her blinking silver headphones and states, "I’m afraid my friends have designed an answer to your weapon, Mr. Speaker. Now, are we going to do this the easy way, or the HARD way? It’s up to you". Thomas momentarily appraises the sexy muscular warrior before him, and responds non-verbally to her question. Without any
warning, three Alabama representatives in the front row rise from seats behind her, boldly attempting to restrain the red-caped QQ. In response, Maw shifts her epidermal molecular
structure to liquid molybdnum that ignites at room temperature when exposed to oxygen.
Two of the puppets struggling to hold her arms back howl in pain and leap away, while a third one is easily tossed to the ground. It takes a few seconds for the brave super-heroine
to realize that this last puppet clutches her pulled-off ECM headpiece in his right hand.
Gangreen smiles maliciously at this turn of events, and quickly puts Maw under his control. As Mademoiselle Mensa begins to stir behind him, the villain decides to have fun
with the captured Quint-Quart. "So nice of you to join our party, young lady. That’s one very flattering costume you’re barely wearing. Those impressive muscles should be shown
to MUCH better advantage, my dear. From this moment forward, you are no longer in the
House chamber, but rather competing in the Miss Nude World Bodybuilder contest! Let’s see you win first prize!" Such is the power and influence of the brain-train upon her mind that the suggested illusion overwhelms her totally. Unable to resist, she now faces a panel of imaginary judges and proceeds to pull off her boots, cape, gloves and the electric blue bikini. Maw next begins a sequence of show-stopping bodybuilding poses which highlight perfect ‘quads’ ‘bis’, ‘delts’, ‘glutes’, ‘pecs’ and ‘abs’. Fictitious photobulbs flash and an audience roars as a now-conscious MM whispers additional suggestions in Thomas’s ear.
The lascivious villain takes one of her ideas to heart, saying, "And now, Maw, you are this
month’s centerfold for Hot Wet Slits porno magazine. I want you to make this the best-selling issue ever!" For an instant of transition between fantasies, the helpless nude victim
breaks free and shouts, "NO!! You son of…", but then her will snaps once more. Standing with her legs spread wide and bending forward with one arm cradling her breasts, the QQ
slides two fingers inside moistening bleach-blonde-covered folds and starts to moan softly.
Mensa and Thomas chuckle openly in their triumph over this last remaining nemesis, then they check the tally board to see how the vote is progressing(...Mr. Davis...AYE.). Next
Maw gives the handsome young magazine photographer she visualizes before her a lusty come-hither stare, and bends over a nearby media table. Spreading apart strong thighs to provide a fully-exposed raw rear view, she reaches between perfectly-toned ass cheeks to recommence uninhibited masturbation. Seconds later, she attains the first of several noisy, creaming, shuddery climaxes to be broadcast live worldwide on CSPAN.
As the two criminals confer excitedly at the podium and enjoy the splendor of this thought-controlled panorama they’ve created, our unfortunate super-heroine shifts from
from one pornographic position to another, until Gangreen exclaims, "WOW! HOLD
YOUR POSE! IT’S PRICELESS!!" Sitting precariously-balanced on top of the table, the brain-trained Quint-Quart has no recourse except to fully comply with this command.
Facing the podium with both legs high up in the air to form a moderately-wide ‘V' shape, Maw has contorted her torso forward almost to sitting-up-straight. The left hand massages
one modest breast, thumb and index finger tweaking a very rigid nipple. Her right hand is somewhat more dexterous, with two fingers exploring deep inside her soaked vagina, and another furiously stimulating her clit. A nirvana-like expression mixing ecstasy and wonder cements on her face as she teeters off the brink into multiple powerful orgasms. She stares
submissively into Gangreen’s eyes with mouth wide open in mid-gasp as a transformation
begins. First her bronze-tanned skin, then bleach-blonde hairs solidify and start to lose all color. She becomes incredibly pale, then milky, then altogether transparent. From her squashed-down bottom to her pointed-straight toes, lines and curves of a sexy muscular frame now begin to etch, sharpen and harden. Soon light rays trespass fully through her body, refracting among thousands of interior-exterior angles, cuts and facets. As the TV camera lights shine down onto her, creating a myriad of blazing rainbow-colored points, it becomes clear that Maw has obeyed Thomas to the letter. She is a lewd crystal statue.
Our diabolical duo exchange looks of surprise at Maw’s interpretation of Thomas’
imperative, then critically appraise the resulting artwork. The Speaker runs his hand down along her glossy carved cheek. MM says, "C’est magnifique! Thees ees an even more beautiful creation than my sculpture of her atop the bell tower. A Waterford company master craftsman could do no better. At lazt, we finally have all four of those meddling Quintessential Quartet clones out of the way. Let us toast to our success!". As she fishes out a bottle of Bollinger RD and two glasses from the bottom of her briefcase, the villains give merely glancing attention to a noisily-clucking Peak-was-too Steep waddling past in front of them. Both heads turn, however, when they hear Kathy England scream from the House chamber aisle, "OH NO!…SHE’S FALLING!!" Strutting a-hair-too-close to the crystallized super-heroine, one of Peak-was-too’s many vigorous wing-flaps has nudged Maw’s upraised luminous left leg. The force is enough to push the statued QQ off-balance from her backsided base, and she spins helplessly sideways then tumbles off the table…
COMIC PAGE THIRTY-FOUR: "The meter is off the scale now...this HAS to be the place", said Scott McGillicutty matter-of-factly just moments earlier. Standing outside the Congressional copy room, Doctor One(aka Joyce Sisters) eyed her companion dubiously.
"Here?? In a Xerox room? Are you certain those Geiger sensors are working OK?", she
queried. Scotty replied,"The anti-proton reservoir signature is unmistakable. We are within
twenty feet of a Fujitoyama cold fusion reactor functioning at full capacity. Check inside for yourself if you don't believe me." Slowly opening the frosted glass door, she peeked in.
Among intermittent bright flashes from the photcopier bulbs, two attractive young blondes in grey pantsuits each seemed laboring to copy pages from thick books. Fidgeting with the ECM headpiece in her ears, Joyce shrugged at this innocuous scene and began a retreat from the tiny room. But then something strange registered on her ocular and sixth senses, setting off an alarm in her head. Both females stood in the center of the room between the controls of forward-and-backward-facing copy machines. The girl at the room's rear had her back turned away and faced the far wall, while the nearer one stared down at her work with an industrious, but slightly concerned expression. Reading her Congressional ID tag, She noted Bobbie VanderHaven was standing with legs pressed together and slightly bent at the waist, her right hand resting on the Xerox START button. And resting...and resting. The copier's output tray revealed to Doctor One that she had reproduced page 134 more than eight hundred times! Bobbie hadn't turned any pages, or noticed Joyce's entrance, or even blinked once from ongoing bright flashes. By now Scott had also entered the room, walking past his confused, suspicious colleague into the open center workspace. The huge ego and libido of Salmander Gangreen was now revealed to a shocked McGillicutty.
Unnoticeable through the frosted glass door window (or even when first entering the copy room, due to the Xerox's partly-raised covering lid), both of the lovely identical
twins had been controlled and brainwave-neutralized, then placed into frozen fake poses to convey the impression that both machines were in use. However, the Speaker was unable to resist these California girls. Casual inspection from the doorway showed Bobbie to be hard at work; now Scott discovered her gray trousers lay crumpled around her ankles, with white lace panties pulled down until stuck between two tight knees. Her suit coattails tucked up and under, a shapely tan-lined paralyzed rear-end stood exposed on full display.
Gasping in surprise at this sexy involuntary moon, Scott turned to examine Barbie. She
too was immobile, some 2-3 steps back and away from the other copier's control panel.
Although her slacks were undisturbed, he soon found by moving in front of her that both blouse and suit coat had been completely unbuttoned, a white lacy bra now stuffed into the
handkerchief pocket. Before Gangreen had used the incapacitating NEUTRAL button on Barbie, he forced her to serve up two tempting large melons as delectable appetizers. She now stood boosting and undercupping upward-and-outward one big breast in each palm. A complex expression blending anger, submission and pleasure was fixed in place, with lips barely parted in hint of a naughty smile. Still-rosy breasts showed pink pointy nipples.
Joyce had to stomp hard on Scotty's left foot to bring him back from his reeling in
response to this scene. "Come on McGillicutty, we've got a job to do here"! Shaking his head side-to-side for a moment, he came round and identified the copier on the back wall as the disguised brain-train. After a careful inspection of the device' interior wiring and controls, he frowned. "Activator coils and hydrogen intake inhibitors are booby-trapped. We’ll have to use our back-up strategy. You’ve got to pull the phase-induction mechanism
apart while I simultaneously cut power to the anti-proton sequencer. Are you ready? On the count of three..." An extremely nervous Joyce Sisters protested while isolating seven
specific gears and cables, "DAMMIT Scotty, I'm a DOCTOR, not a mechanic"! And yet they were successful. Seconds later an intended overloading implosion had begun to build.
As room temperature rose rapidly, Scott lifted the frozen bottomless and topless bookends out to the safety of the hallway one-by-one. Meanwhile, Joyce had heard Kathy scream from inside the adjacent House chamber, and sprinted off to offer any assistance possible.
COMIC PAGE THIRTY-FIVE: THUNKK!!…BUMP!!…rumble…clatter…roll…stop.
The flawless Maw-statue strikes the marble tile of the House chamber floor with amazing
force, but does not shatter. Expecting to hear the telltale clinking noise of breaking glass, Mademoiselle and Thomas move to scrutinize the toppled QQ warrior, now resting side-ways on left calf and thigh muscles (legs still arranged up-and-out in a stiffened V-shape). Sound from the collision between floor and sculpture was more solid and denser somehow than expected. Suddenly the realization strikes MM. "Mon Dieu! How did you describe her? Priceless? Certainment, monsieur, you have transformed her into solid diamond!"
This revelation only momentarily distracts Salamander Gangreen from the task at hand. Just as Maw had been vanquished minutes earlier, the villain uses a House member sneaking up from behind her to snatch away Kathy England’s ECM protective headgear. The sexy supermodel now marches mindlessly to stand three feet in front of an obviously excited Thomas. "And to what do we owe the pleasure of your visit?", he asks. Unable to answer with anything less than complete truth in her controlled state, she drones, "I am DNA donor for Looker of the Quintessential Quartet super-heroine team. My colleagues and I have come to rescue her and thwart your plans." He retorts, "Too-little-too-late on both counts, beautiful. You two are mother and daughter? Yes, I do see a strong likeness- resembling flip sides of the same coin. Well, since I already thoroughly enjoyed Looker’s ‘tail’ side, perhaps you will demonstrate the ‘head’…NOW!" The Speaker’s eyes narrow, and the blank-faced Genesis Donor drops to her knees while starting to lower his pants zipper. Just at this moment Doctor One bursts into the chamber, noisily sprinting down the main aisle. "Another one? This is becoming tiresome", moans Thomas while he quickly commands two representative-puppets to block Joyce’s path. As she is forced to a sudden, leaning-forward, unbalanced halt, a third rep yanks away her ECM headphones, and the villain depresses SINGLE and NEUTRAL buttons on his remote control. The brilliant Ph.D.’s mind is instantly placed "on hold", and she is left teetering motionless with a look of awkward surprise on her face. An amused smile crosses Thomas’countenance, but this changes into arousal as famous fingers coax a hardening member out from inside boxers and into the CSPAN spotlight. Closing his eyes anticipating the pleasurable power-trip of a delicious supermodel blow job, Mr. Speaker doesn’t see the many changes around him.
Slowly and intermittently at first, but soon extending out to all persons in the House of Representatives chamber, influence from the brain-train device wanes and ebbs. As the sargeant-at-arms continues his monotone poll (Mr. Leventhal…NAY! Ms. Lewis…NAY! Mr. Lohmann…AYE! Mr. Lowe…HELL NO!), it is obvious that members are voting with reclaimed wills and consciences. Hundreds of pairs of eyes blink, dizzy heads now are shaken to clarity, and attentions turn angrily to the diabolical duo standing at the podium. MM notices first and warns, "Cherie, something ees wrong…zubjects are not responding to your commands and are reviving!" Gangreen considers the tally board and notes with dismay they have yet to record the 2/3 majority needed to override a Presidential veto. He exclaims, "DAMMIT!! Looks like Plan A is shot to hell…Let’s go to our backup Plan B! We'd better take the lovely Maw with us as an insurance policy. I know an Arabian sheik who’ll pay millions for our muscular diamond friend here as the centerpiece to his harem’s ornamental fountain. Come on…OUCH!" (an angry Kathy has just twisted his testicles). As they labor carrying along the heavy crystal statue, MM must expend two raygun firings on the wide DISDAIN setting to create sufficient diversions and allow them to escape.
COMIC PAGE THIRTY-SIX: D.C. Police Sergeant Mickey Mahoney was assigned to the Congressional security detail over three years ago, yet today would easily qualify as his most bizarre. Assigned to chamber door guard duty, he had watched in amazement as the Speaker of the House emerged from the nearby copier room (a purple-and-pink repairman in tow) while sporting a crown on his head! As he argued with Salamander Gangreen over his companion's lack of security clearance needed to reach the floor, the Speaker had then depressed the SINGLE button on some sort of remote. A brief buzzing in his skull was the last thing he remembered until now. Yet several more strange events were still to come...
As he shakes his befuddled head and rubs aching temples, Mickey blinks a few times and notices a young man in a white lab coat emerging from the copier room. He wears thick spectacles and has the distinct appearance of a scientific nerd; however what he is carrying belies that conclusion. A dynamite-looking Congressional page is being stiffly hoisted out through the frosted glass door. Mahoney recognizes the tall blonde bombshell as one of the VanderHaven twins (he has tried twice unsuccessfully to strike up conversations with them). As the nerd places the girl down to stand wobbling on her own two feet, the cop notices that her suit coat and shirt are wide open, both incredible boobs fully exposed. Barbie is actually pushing-up both tits with her hands! As he moves toward this unexpected sight, another lovely identical twin (hands propped against a hallway wall) enters his field of view from behind the open copy room door. Bobbie's dropped trousers and lowered lace panties reveal a bare ass which stops Officer Mahoney in his tracks.
Scott McGillicutty sees the approaching cop and states, "Great! I see effects from the mind controller are starting to wear off . Can you give me a hand here?" The skeptical policeman replies, "Looks like you don't need any help, mister. Exactly what the HELL are you doing anyway?" Mahoney's attention shifts to the Xerox room interior, where the fire suppression sprinklers have been set off. As he enters to investigate further, Scotty warns, "Careful where you step, officer. Have you seen the movie The China Syndrome?" At the back of the room, a black smoldering 3'x5' hole in the floor is all that remains of the imploding, superheated brain-train. Mickey peers down to find similar gaping self-made passageways for the faux copier in each of the five floor levels below him (including the concrete foundation in the basement). As luck would have it, the plush private office of Salamander Gangreen lies right beneath the copy room, and an astonished cop gets a clear view of the stupefied Looker, who is still leaning forward propped on her elbows across the Speaker's desk. The super-heroine bends unmoving with crossed eyes, lips formed into a tight 'o', and the top of a gorgeous heart-shaped moon visible above her rolled-up skirt. "Holy $@!^%&*!", utters Mahoney, while this third frozen nude female brings his patience to an end. Returning soaking-wet back into the hall, he loosens his revolver and handcuffs. McGillicutty sees the expression on his face and says nervously, "Now...uhh ... there IS a reasonable explanation for all this. Believe it or not, I am actually HELPING these girls, while saving you and everbody else!" The frowning cop's reply is non-verbal.
COMIC PAGE THIRTY-SEVEN: Wisps of noxious thick green vapor accompany Mademoiselle Mensa and Salamander Gangreen as they step into the main reception area outside the Oval Office. Shutting the hallway door behind them MM begins, "We're having an incredible string of good luck now, Cheri! First, the top Secret Service agent in charge of White House security greets us at the front gate. He was such a perfect gentleman as
our personal escort past all those check-points, thanks to my brain-ingrain. It ees truly a pity that neither he nor any of those other dozen guards have the antidote to my knockout gas, n'est-ce-pas? They should enjoy their little rest. Next, we meet Vice-President Gere in the elevator coming upstairs!" Gangreen responds, "Yeah, and Alan's always so somber and serious, I couldn't tell from his facial expression when the brain-drain stupefied him!" Both villains laugh as MM shows Thomas the LED message on her raygun's control panel: ERROR #87: PARTIAL BRAIN-TRAIN COMPLETED. SUBJECT PERSONALITY INSUFFICIENT FOR TRANSFER. Thomas continues, "Now where is that flirty redhead with the incredible body that Clampett hired as his new personal secretary?"
The outer office stands vacant, with solid oak double doors leading into the President's sanctuary tightly closed. For some reason, the Secret Service agents usually assigned to guard the last security checkpoint outside the Oval Office apparently have been dismissed. Mademoiselle and Thomas exchange looks of confusion, until they hear moaning and heavy breathing coming from the adjacent room. Smiling knowingly and in triumph, Gangreen announces, "Sounds like quite an interesting meeting going on in there. That sex-crazed Hillbilly will never know what hit him. And with the VP already out of the way, I'm just a heartbeat- no, brainwave- away from the Presidency. The time has come to complete our Plan B, Jackie, or should I say "Mrs. First Lady"? The evil villainess’ green eyes sparkle as she bursts through the doors with raygun raised and ready to fire.
An astonished Suzy Slutsky is caught kneeling atop the Connolly desk. Balancing on slightly-apart knees and shins, she leans rearwards with her back and torso fully arched in a pose of erotic seduction. A beautiful bent backside rises delightfully off the desk edge some four feet above the ground. The top several buttons of her frilly blouse hang open, allowing generous-sized breasts to bounce freely outside the confines of a pink lace bra. Suzy's fingers are at first dutifully holding the hemline of her miniskirt up above her trim athletic waist, out of the way of President Clampett's attentions. But now as Mademoiselle disturbs their privacy, Suzy’s left hand suddenly points in dismay at the villains, and then begins moving to cover up her wide-open mouth poised in a classic amazed expression.
Yet the outstretched cupped fingers would halt some twelve inches away from her ruby lips. Before either she or the President (standing right behind her proffered derriere) can react any further, they are both fully bathed in the broad blue beam of MM’s brain-drain.
Clampett manages to protest with, "Gangreen, WHAT THE HELL?!"; however the sexy personal secretary is struck dumb. Literally. Thinking to herself , "HELP! Everything’s getting...fuz..zy…can’t… rememb…", Suzy loses all ability to speak or move any muscle.
As the raygun's firing sequence ends, she is left rigidly gaping cross-eyed at the intruders.
The microchip targeting computer inside MM's evil weapon had faced a quandary. Running low on power, and simultaneously faced with two human brain targets, it focused upon the lovely redhead (the brain-train microcircuitry defaulted to its original feminine transfer settings) while leaving the man's intellect intact. A confused Bob Clampett shakes his dizzy head, then considers the ravishing stupefied Suzy-statue before him. Lust takes over as his primary motivator (has it ever not been?) and he opens his pants zipper to free an extremely excited First Dick. Grabbing the frozen woman around her well-proportioned hips, he begins wild thrusting into an upraised, immobile fiery-red-draped nether region. Mademoiselle Mensa moans, "Merde! I missed him! And I don't theenk I have enough battery charge to fire another blast. Wait! I have another idea. Rummaging through her
briefcase, MM quickly produces a small camera. Salamander Gangreen laughs gleefully while snatching the 35MM automatic from her hands. "This will be even more effective at throwing Clampett out of office than your brain-drain. Smile Bob! The whole world is about to finally discover the real you!", he announces to a still-busily-humping President..
While flashbulbs illuminate this racy encounter from various graphic angles over the next seconds, our villains don't notice two shadows as they appear in the Oval Office doorway.
"Oh my GOD!", exclaims Doctor One as she surveys the bizarre scene inside the very heart and soul of the United States Government. But circumstances appear to affect Joyce's companion somewhat differently. Kathy England has had just about enough of these two megalomaniacs, and her notorious British temper blows! Striding purposefully toward MM and Thomas with a furious expression on her face, the evil villainess warns the House Speaker (still engrossed in snapping pictures) of her approach with, "Cheri, we
have a visitor, and she does not look happy with us." Gangreen glances up saying, "HER!?
what the hell can SHE do to us...bat her eyelashes?...blow kisses?" Then, with a certain degree of annoyance, he commands, "SHOOT HER!" Mademoiselle Mensa aims and fires.
For the next 2-3 seconds, the flickering broad blue beam of the insidious brain-drain
raygun encompasses the beautiful supermodel, but does not slow her down. Kathy is just four feet away from the evil villainess when the weapon signals an operational malfunction via loud electronic beeping, then enters auto-shutdown. A surprised and concerned MM is caught reading an error message on the LED display when she is doubled-over by a sturdy fist deposited into her stomach. Wild-eyed but helpless with the breath knocked out of her, the very last sight she sees is Kathy's Etienne Aigner high-heel landing a karate kick to the bridge of her nose. Two seconds later, Jacqueline Abrutez-Vous is out cold on the carpet.
Salamander Gangreen fares even worse at the hands of the lovely Genesis Donor. He only barely manages to hang onto the small camera as a shapely knee thrusts powerfully into his groin. Reeling in agony, he can do nothing while Kathy grabs his outstretched left arm to flip him judo-style straight through the large bay window panes behind the Connolly desk.
Thomas collapses unconscious among the juniper bushes on the White House south lawn.
Joyce Sisters is happily flabbergasted with two unanswered questions on her mind. She begins, "Kathy, HOW did you...?" when the pleased-with-herself supermodel replies, "Moves courtesy of Miss Hovey's Finishing School self-defense class, Doctor!" The Ph.D. is now joined by FBI agent John Straightarrow in the Oval Office doorway, who moves quickly to handcuff Mademoiselle Mensa while inquiring, "Thanks for tipping us off about their plan B, ladies, but just how did you know where they were headed after they left the Capitol Building?" Doctor One answers, "Gangreen's penchant for souvenirs tripped him up this time. The bikini bottom from Maw's costume has a homing beacon device sewn into its elastic waist. I noticed that electric blue material sticking out of his suit coat pocket just a moment ago. But, Kathy, HOW in the WORLD did you manage to waltz straight through that stupefying beam which has frozen so many others in their tracks?"
The gorgeous supermodel has no reply, so Joyce walks over to the raygun lying on the carpet next to Bob Clampett (who has finally revived from his back-door frenzy and is frantically trying to tuck back in his shirt and buckle his belt). Suzy's lips have moved from a gaping 'o' to a half-smile now, but a drop of drool escapes out the corner of her mouth.
As the Ph.D. reads an error message on the raygun's LED display, a look of understanding passes across her face. Showing the screen to the others, we see it reads: ERROR #33:
SUBJECT COGNITION INSUFFICIENT TO MERIT TRANSFER. BRAIN- DRAIN ABORTED. Joyce tries to stifle her laugh, while Kathy simply shrugs sheepishly.
They are interrupted from their musings by special agent Straightarrow asking, "Where's Gangreen?!" All heads turn (except MM's and Suzy's) to discover nothing more than a large dent in the South Lawn shrubbery where the House Speaker had lain only moments before. A frantic inquiry over his walkie-talkie reveals to John that Thomas has managed to bully his way past the front gate security guards, camera in hand. The FBI man frowns.
Joyce pulls a pillbox-sized-and-shaped electronic device out of a leather bag while establishing audio contact with Professor Nils Johannson in New Mexico on her wrist communicator. As Mademoiselle Mensa begins to slowly regain consciousness, Doctor One reports, "This is Operation Hail Mary calling The Hall of Fame. We've apprehended
Jacqueline Abrutez-Vous, and are now in possession of her raygun. I am commencing the installation of the cognition restoration module, as planned." A Swedish-accented voice emerges from the communicator to say, "Yaah, I receive you loud and clear. Let us hope those blueprints agent Straightarrow recovered during a search of the Artificial Intellicorp offices are fully accurate of the prototype. Good luck!" A complex male-female docking
prong slides perfectly into the last remaining empty slot of the brain-drain’s in-line mode selector. A distinct "click" is heard, and the heretofore out-of-power weapon springs back to life. A series of module green lights confirm interfacing software and hardware systems checks to be successful. Joyce smiles and exclaims, "Nils, You’ve done it! It works!" MM cannot contain her curiosity any longer, asking, "What are you doing to my brain-drain?"
Nils Johannson hears the question and leaps at the opportunity to explain his final triumph over such a formidable adversary personally. He begins,"You may regard our new module, Jacqueline, as an electromagnetic resonance frequency isolator. Theoretically, each one of your poor victim’s brainwave patterns can be identified, bundled and then transferred back to their rightful owners. The only limiting factor is the time and degree of interaction and assimilation your own thought patterns may have had in contaminating their unique frequencies. Doctor One has nicknamed this process as the brain-strain. The process, however, will require many hours of intense concentration and cooperation from you as the brainwave host. You have been defeated, Mademoiselle Mensa. I must appeal to your sense of dignity and mercy to help us now fully restore the lives of a dozen people.
Yaah, what do you say?" MM motions to the FBI agent to release her from handcuffs. Once free, she replies defiantly, "Jamais! Never! I now have the most gifted mind on zee face of the earth, with a collective genius many times that of yourz, Professor. And I do NOT intend to give that up, even eef it means I must now spend many years inside prison.
Once I am released , I shall lavish my brilliant revenge upon you all! Placing her hands on her hips with legs spread apart, she exclaims, YOU HAVE NOT HEARD ZEE LAST FROM MADEMOISELLE MENSA!!!" A shocked silence follows MM’s monologue.
Having fully anticipated this response from the evil villainess, Nils simply responds,
"You may proceed with the alternate plan, Doctor One. Kathy should possess more than adequate unused storage capacity." Jackie’s green eyes are saucer-wide as the raygun’s headpiece is placed on Kathy England’s pretty blonde locks while Joyce points the funnel toward MM with the selector set on DRAIN. The pillbox brain-strain module is plugged into an ordinary wall outlet next to the Connolly desk, and lights all over Washington D.C.
flicker feebly as the megalomaniacal Mademoiselle faces a destiny of her own making inside the swath of the wide blue beam seventeen consecutive times! And yet, once the sad process is at last completed and the LED indicator reads REMAINING COGNITION 0%,
virtually no visible clue is evident as to our beautiful villainess’stupefication. She maintains
the exact same defiant pose as when she made her final speech, while continuing to scowl condescendingly at her captors. Yet as with many of her own brain-drain victims, one last trivial thought bounces stubbornly around inside her lovely-but-empty head. Desperately trying to cling onto any rational idea, she notices an uncomfortable pressure and realizes, "too much garlic in my vichysscoise..." before falling into a raygun-induced dumbfounded darkness. She could no longer stop it. Almost imperceptibly slowly at first, but then quite noticeably, MM bends slightly forward at the waist (perhaps under the weight of incredible cleavage bursting forth from a glittering purple-and-pink costume?). Then Joyce, Kathy, agent Straightarrow and President Clampett are surprised by an unusually long and loud ppphhhhffffFFFFARRRTTTT noise escaping from underneath Mademoiselle’s minidress.
Crinkling her nose, Kathy says, "Phewh! Let's hope NOW we've heard the last from her."
COMIC PAGE THIRTY-EIGHT: Theoretical physics and its real-world practice are often two very different phenomena; but in the case of the Professor's brain-strain module design, all went well- up to a point. Unique and specific brainwave patterns were identified and fully restored for eight of the thirteen victims of MM's evil raygun (Suzy, VP Gere,
Looker, Inga, Generals Hadden and Hawke, Emma and Debbie Stemp). Alas, too much contamination had occurred to bring others to a full recovery; however, basic motor skills and rudimentary speech abilities were returned to Marilyn Brookes and Janet Jenkins. These latter two women will enroll into Washington D.C. public schools kindergarten the next fall, where their re-education and future prospects look bright (should they survive).
The world mourned the loss of the geniuses of Fujitoyama, Hammond, and Dolton-Harris.
Salmander Gangreen was removed in absentia as Speaker of the U.S. House of Representatives, while FBI agent John Straightarrow headed up a special task force trying to locate him and bring him to justice. He has so far remained slippery and slimy enough (true to his nickname) to crawl away and hide underneath a very out-of-the-way rock. Yet before he left, the villain managed to pass along his candid photos of Bob Clampett to the National Enquirer. For all his past ducking and weaving, "slick Bobbie" could not defend successfully against pictures of him enthusiastically boinking a statued redhead. Forced to resign in disgrace, Vice-President Gere glumly took over the country's reins.
Some eight hours after her performance on the House floor, Maw awoke aboard a DHL cargo jet coming in for a landing at Tenerife airport in the Canary Islands. Finding herself packed gingerly inside a wooden crate destined for a palace in the Sultantate of Oman, she had startled the pilot of the plane so much by entering the cockpit totally nude that he had sent front landing wheels off of the runway and into a muddy bog. As with her
prior stoning, instability within the proto-matter crystalline matrix had come to her rescue.
Scott McGillicutty was released from his Washington D.C. police precinct #11 jail cell with all sexual assault and arson charges completely dropped. During QQ’s various country-saving heroics, however, his whereabouts went undetermined for more than ten hours. Bailed out in the wee morning hours by Looker, Kathy and Joyce, his night behind bars with five lonely hardened criminals is a topic he still won't discuss even to this day.
COMIC PAGE THIRTY-NINE: A stereotypical Brit family of four walks into the Chamber of Horrors section of Madame Tussaud’s London Wax Museum. The Hyde-Smythe’s are on holiday from Cardiff, and the father is still tired from his seven hour drive to the city on the previous day. The ‘Mum’ is more than a little annoyed at the two hour wait in line outside the museum they endured in a steady cold March drizzle, as well as the ridiculous 12-pound-per-person entrance fee. But Nick and Nora, their two early-teenage children, couldn’t have cared less at the moment about anything except the startling new exhibit Tussaud’s has opened for the first time on this very day. Racing into the large room filled with wax representations of history’s most notorious villains, Nick shouts in his squeaky pre-pubescent voice, "Look, Mum and Pop, there SHE is! WOW!!...", while his sister gapes at the brand-new duo before her with a mixture of fear and amazement.
The news media had broken the story, but the museum public relations reps would
neither confirm nor deny they had paid the International Court of Justice at the Hague a
secret bailout sum rumored in excess of five million US dollars. However, the estranged husband of Patricia Dolton-Harris had talked extensively to the Baltimore Sun about his six-figure Tussaud’s compensation. After all, he had said, it wasn’t fair for the Nobel
committee to renege on their promised prize money just because Patricia was deemed to be legally brain-dead, was it? He felt like he deserved something for putting up with that egghead for all those years, and he sure as hell didn’t want to pay nursing home expenses.
So when the offer came from London, the greedy SOB literally jumped at the opportunity.
The wax museum, in turn, felt the rumors would at least quadruple interest in their exhibit.
Standing off in the far corner of the room, between a harrowing display of Jack the Ripper and the execution sequence of Gary Gilmore, a thick-spectacled woman in a white medical coat leans precariously backwards and sideways with both her hands clutching her head. The classic look of horror frozen on her shiny waxen face matches beautifully with the many other hapless victims on display in the room. About every twenty seconds or so,
a flickering blue flashlight bulb illuminates out from the muzzle of a funnel-shaped raygun
held in the hand of the terrified woman’s attacker. Standing menacingly with both legs spread apart and one hand on her hip, we now see a purple-and-pink costumed villainess
smiling cruelly with green eyes flashing. Madame Tussaud’s craftsmen have succeeded in
creating an almost exact replica of the stupefication scene in Stockholm some weeks ago. Yet, for this particular display, museum designers have outdone themselves. A stiffening shiny acrylic spray applied to hair and exposed skin blends both figures in perfectly with the scores of other dummies keeping them company. Self-moisturizing contact lenses go unnoticed, while IV tubes and other catheter-pouches run up inside their hosiery alongside the corner wall and under clothing so as to be invisible to the hundreds of passing tourists.
Tussaud’s had been right about the popularity of their new exhibit; however, they underestimated the degree of disdain and resentment that this evil villainess had generated
in the mind of the general public. In fact, even now- just three hours after its unveiling- a young female museum employee is hard at work removing graffiti from the bronze plaque nameplate screwed into the foot-high podium on which the two display figures stand. A spiteful visitor had already marked through MM’s title with permanent ink, changing the sign to read MADEMOISELLE DENSE-A. Another self-appointed joker has scratched through this defacement and replaced it with (more appropriately?) MMLE. DUNCE-A.
As the staff worker labors to remove this handwriting, the Hyde-Smythes step up to the display. The father (who has heard all the rumors about these being the actual paralyzed women, rather than wax dummies) eyes both figures curiously for some minutes before addressing the Tussaud’s employee, "Excuse me, young lady, but is this to be a permanent addition to the Chamber of Horrors collection?" Looking somewhat chagrined, she replies, "Why, actually no, Sir. The display will stand for seven-to-ten years, depending
on a variety of circumstances." He asks, "Will she get time off for good behavior then??"
The worker blushes as Nick reaches under exhibit ropes trying to pull up MM’s minidress.
COMIC PAGE FORTY: Four recuperating Quint-Quarts lounge peacefully on the warm sands about a hundred yards away from surfers frolicking offshore famous Waikiki Beach. Looker sunbathes tummy-down upon a large green beach towel while wearing a flattering aquamarine micro bikini (top tie-strings open to prevent tan lines). Inga and Maw are playing backgammon nearby at a small table set between two beach chairs, and Emma reads the New York Times while sitting cross-legged (hindi-style) on the sand. Above the top of her striped one-piece suit (which leaves little to the imagination about the size and contours of her young breasts) and below her mirror-reflective sunshades, a distinct frown is apparent. "HEY, listen to this, gals!", Emma exclaims, quoting peculiar headlines from across the nation. "Nine Playboy Centerfolds vanished into thin air during a Playmate-of-the-Year reception in Los Angeles!". This announcement catches the interest of Inga, who stops in the middle of a dice roll to say, "HUH?!" Emma continues, "Yeah, and would you believe seven Norman Rockwell paintings were stolen right out from under the noses of gallery security guards in broad daylight at a special Hollywood art exhibit?!" Looker chimes in, "I have a feeling the Professor will want us..." She stops in mid-sentence as a shadow passes over her face. A darkly-tanned man with a scruffy beard wearing a t-shirt and surfer jams looms over her. In his left hand is an oversized leather briefcase, while perched on his right shoulder is a beautiful red Macaw. "Morning Ladies!!", he begins, "I see you are enjoying our Hawaiian sunshine. Can I interest any or all of you in having your picture taken with my friend Pedro here? It would make a great souvenir postcard..."
Looker loses patience with this cheesy beach bum vendor and rolls over to scold him with, "TAKE A HIKE!". However, she has forgotten about the condition of her top, and ends up providing a peek-a-boo show which convinces the guy to stick around a little longer.
Slightly wide-eyed and trying to tear his gaze from remarkable rose-pink nipples, he opens his case and continues, "Uh...well...how about some fine gold jewelry, or maybe a watch? I just got a dozen Rolexes shipped in from LA yesterday". Maw scrutinizes one timepiece with a jeweled face while the vendor says, "That's got more than fifty diamonds inside, but
I'll let it go for only $500!" The Quint-Quart warrior tosses it back to the man and replies, "You're trying to swindle the wrong lady, bud. I KNOW diamond when I see it. Besides, this watch...all the 'Rolexes'...are running slow. They've each lost exactly twelve minutes. I wouldn't spend five bucks for a ticker that keeps time that badly". He looks puzzled by
the innacuracy, then gets defensive, "Listen, honey, I only sell highest-quality merchandise. You ladies would have to be pretty stupid to pass up buys such as these!" Looker, Emma and Inga exchange glances before Ingeno-Lady replies, "You might be surprised just how
stupid we can be at times". The Quintessential Quartet bursts out laughing as he walks off.
author's note: Our super-heroines return in "Colonel Chronos and the Time Bomb" -R.